Motherhood

Though I am not a biological mother, I have nurtured, guided, taught and loved thousands as a teacher and a librarian. In fact, it was a common fact that many of the career teachers in the South were not biological mothers. Perhaps that is why they had the patience, fortitude and time to steer other people’s children in the right direction.

I am currently working with young mothers who drop their children off at daycare as they entrust their young ones to others for a few hours. I see how they love their children, say long goodbyes and if their children are having a rough morning, they lovingly pick them up and take them to their destinations, at the risk of being late for work.

As the saying goes, “Once a mother, always a mother.” Some used to think that motherhood ended when their children left the nest. But, we now know that this is not the case. If their adult children are  going through a few miles of rough road, any real parent will help them gather the pieces and do what they can to assist them. It’s what good parents do. It is an endless but gratifying role that has many inner rewards. 

As the youngest in a family of four children, I was there when all of the sisters came back to the nest at some point. They needed a break from real life and a second wind to go out there and slay their dragons. Our parents unhesitantly opened the door to receive them. They were both willing and able to be there for them. Again, it is what good parents do as they love their children until the end of their days on earth.

If the money is low and they can not pick their children up and carry them, they offer loads of encouragement, offer them good books and preach and pray over them. The mothers and fathers, aunts, uncles and grandparents and even unknown people will  come to the aid while helping a child feel that they ‘can do it.‘  

Sometimes, the guidance comes from the most unlikely places. While in the 8th grade, me and my best friend, Carolyn were walking down the mean streets of Woodlawn in Chicago while lighting up a cigarette. We were both teachers’ pets with Tennessee roots and we were desperately trying to fit in with the local hoodwinks. This woman leaned out her window and hollered  “Put it out!” We did not know her but the authority in her voice made us obey quickly. She was acting as a village mother. It truly takes a village! 

So, to all of the mothers whether biological mothers, sister mothers, foster mothers, village mothers and any other title that encompasses the following qualities, I salute you during this Mother’s Day weekend. They are loving, helpful, guiding lights as they steer, redirect reprimand, nudge, reset, nurture, and of course, the list of caring qualities is endless.

“The earth will help the woman….” Revelation 12: 16

Lynn M.
May 11, 2024

The Piano

The other day there was so much going on in the news that I had to just pull the plug. From the catastrophic weather to campus unrest to local tragedies, I tuned into YouTube. I found some relaxing piano playing music. It was like a reawakening and it reminded me of parts of my childhood.

We normally had a piano in the home. We could all play a few chords and some of the siblings were better than others. Two of the sisters took piano lessons and one had a piano teacher named Mr. Payton who used to come by the house to teach her. He used to spank her fingers when she made mistakes. I observed and thought, “Not doing that.”

Anyway, I listened to the soothing piano music for hours the other night. It took me back to a time before I left the nest. It was like going back to sanity. It took me back to a time before the angst of romance. Before job searches. Before job stuff that consumes way too much of one’s soul, mind and time. Before making rent and buying groceries. Before deciding which bills to pay and which temporarily rested on the back burner.

It was like doing a total reset and quite comparable to cleaning old data off of the cell phone. It was like deleting  junk out of the email. It was like getting rid of spam, or taking out the old clothes, coats and shoes that have not been worn in years.

I felt rejuvenated and refreshed after listening to the piano music and I even felt reconnected to my mother and father. They held it down as they moved in a well-choreograghed dance. I now realize how many moving parts and pieces it takes minute by minute to simply remain afloat.

I did not plan to listen to piano music but Spirit knew that I needed something to serve as an anchor during the swaying of the ship of life. I was led to a couple of great piano music videos which lasted for hours and it has made all of the difference yet. Afterwards, I felt like going on. It was like a flashing yellow light signaling, “Slow down and proceed with caution!”

Lynn M.
May 4, 2024

Detroit: A Phoenix Bird!

The other night I was watching the NFL Draft which is not really my thing. But when I heard that it was taking place in Detroit, Michigan, I decided to tune in. You see, Detroit had such a bad image for many decades. It had fallen into a deep decline and was once deemed The Murder Capital of the World.

After the drug and crack epidemics and the continuous scandals that rocked the local government, it was a place that most people avoided going to or even visiting because of the dangers there. After the car industry was downsized and Motown pulled out and moved to California, there was little left to attract the outside world.

Why do I care? I was born there. My parents, both from different birth states, met there, married there and had us four children there. Though we left Detroit when I was about five years old, I was always proud to say that I was born in Detroit, Michigan when we had relocated to Memphis, Tennessee. It is on my birth certificate, so Detroit and I are forever linked.

It is named after the Detroit River which connects Lake Huron with Lake Erie. Thus, in French, detroit means strait according to good ole’ Wikipedia. However, Detroit, Michigan’s path has been anything but straight. Most fled as it became an embarrassment and few wanted to be associated with the city, except for Aretha Franklin. She stuck and stayed with a few hiatuses, until the end of her days. She even helped the people in distress during the nearby Flint water crisis. She was a die-hard Detroiter.

I went back once for a weekend in the early 70’s and I returned in one piece. I purposely chose a flight layover through Detroit in 2014 as I flew from Chicago to Boston. I wanted to feel some connection to my place of birth. The airport was really nice, and I bought a pink Detroit sweatshirt that I wore until the letters were washed away.

So, when I saw the city hosting the NFL’s Drafts, I felt I had to check in and see what I thought. I expected to soon turn it off, but I relished each moment. I kept it on until the program went off the air. The city has risen from the ashes, quite like the Phoenix bird. I am certain that each pocket of the city has not been fixed but at least the NFL fans obviously felt safe.

I am so happy that  Detroit is being showcased on the world stage. I can close by repeating the words of Native American Writer, Marilou Awiakta and say, “Out of ashes, peace will rise.”  She demonstrated this at a University of Memphis workshop and had us all stand and repeat this as we turned north, south, east and west.  Again, “Out of ashes, peace will rise.”  Keep healing Detroit!

Lynn M.
April 27, 2024

Goose on the Loose!

The other day at work, I saw some movement through my peripheral vision. I looked up and saw a forlorn goose who seemed to be on the loose.  It  was obviously in distress as it paced to and fro as if saying, “What am I going to do?”  It must have been afraid to flap its wings and fly away.  Maybe, it was a baby that was not sure of itself and did not have the confidence to try its wings.

This went on for a while and I was ,of course, helpless to help this bird who appeared to be in a pickle. So, I took out my cell phone and snapped a picture as the movement continued on the roof. At points and times, I thought that it had found its way and was gone, but then it  would reappear. I am not sure if anyone else even noticed what was going on as the children noisily played outside on the playground.

Then, all at once, it happened. The calvary showed up and a flock of geese descended and retrieved their lost child.  Just like that, they all flew away together. It was a life lesson. Actually, it held several life lessons for me.  I first thought of the saying, “A friend in need is a friend indeed.” Then a barrage of songs came to mind such as, “You’ve Got a Friend in Me” (Randy Newman); “Lean on Me” (Bill Withers), “You’ve Got a Friend,” (Carole King) or Whitney Houston’s version of “Help is on the Way!”

I exhaled and briefly thought of the many angels in the form of people who had come to my rescue as I proverbially, paced the ledge. Nature teaches us how things truly work if we only take the time to observe and listen. Amen to the rescues!

Lynn M.
April 21, 2024

Spring is Springing!

Spring is truly springing,
Birds are cooing, singing.

Trees are slowly blooming,
Loud music from cars – booming.

People are feeling quite happy,
Talking more, even yapping.

Blue skies seen for a mile,
Folks? Feeling less vile.

Woodpeckers are tapping,
While babies are napping.

Coats, jackets – coming off,
Inhaling fresh air; less cough.

Spring is finally here!
Ahh! Let out a big cheer!

Lynn M.
April 13, 2024

Lynn M.
April 13, 2024

Ragtime: In Concert

I saw Ragtime: In Concert presented by The Highland Park Players in Wilmette, Illinois after hearing about it on television. I was happy to know that it was not too far from home and I recalled Helen Keller’s words, “Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.” So, I immediately went online, purchased tickets for the Sunday matinee and ventured out for a new adventure.

I found the venue with a level of ease and had recently driven past the location as I was headed somewhere else. Upon arriving, I saw that the place was packed as people calmly chatted with each other and milled around before the musical started. I imagine it is a tightly-knitted community up on Chicago’s North Shore.

When the curtains were lifted, there was the Jam Orchestra seated towards the back of the stage and not in a pit. I could get a good look at them and even noted the large harp to the left of the stage. Behind them, there sat The Choir with their choir books. It was an interesting set up and  the stage was still spacious enough for the actors to have plenty of room to move around and roll on their props towards the front of the floor.

Aaron Kaplan, the animated conductor, opened the play with music, the choir raised their voices in song and several players took the stage. There were three groups of people who were visibly separated. One was the wealthy white family of privilege, the newly-arrived immigrants who had probably been through Ellis Island and the marginalized black community. Each had its own stories and challenges as all sought to survive the American scene. The setting was around 1908 in New York City.

Through song, speeches, soliloquies and dance, the stories poured out and members of the three  groups became intertwined. The wealthy Mother took in an abandoned black child and her mother (Sarah). Consequently, her lover, the musician Coalhouse Walker, Jr. showed up to try to woo her and he often played ragtime music on their piano to pass the time. When her husband, Father, returned from his expedition to the North Pole, needless to say, he was less than happy to see people of color in his home.

In the meantime, Tateh, a Jewish widower and single father of a daughter peddled his drawings and silhouettes. He became increasingly frustrated with his financial challenges as he searched for the American dream until his pictures finally began to sell. He, too, met Mother and her son, Little Boy, on a couple of occasions. Quite like a dance, the three groups’ lives intermingled as they all looked for ways to cope with life and its curve balls.

Famous icons who influenced society during that era dotted the stage featuring greats such as the activist Emma Goldman who constantly found herself on her soap box in the midst of protests. There was actress Evelyn Nesbitt Thaw, whose millionaire husband had killed architect Stanford White over his wife. It was laughingly called the ‘crime of the century,’ though they noted that the century still had over 90 years left in it. Henry Ford and his assembly line production was on the horizon along with Harry Houdini, Booker T. Washington and J.P. Morgan. All helped to reveal the social climate of the time as they shared their contributions.

The persecution of Coalhouse Walker, Jr. took center stage after his new T-Model Ford was vandalized and his beloved Sarah was mobbed while she sought help for him. As in life, some had bigger hearts than others but a growth in attitudes and perceptions in spite of cultural differences was the theme. The play was based on E.L. Doctorow’s novel of the same name and the musical was written by Playwright Terrence McNally.

The songs were great. The acting and dancing were superb and in the midst of pains and hardships, the audience left the play feeling uplifted. The long standing ovation, cat calls, whistles and bravos went on for a while at the end. All seemed to agree that it was a great way to spend a spring Sunday afternoon!

Lynn M.
April 7, 2024

Good People!

In the black community, upon the mention of a person’s name, you may receive the brief response, “Good people.” That simply means that the person being discussed is a decent human being and has obviously left a few good vibrations out there.

As we spring into the warm, milder temperatures of Spring, more people will be out and about as they enjoy the weather. There will be more encounters with others as we run into people we know and as we meet other people for the first time.

Someone may give us the heads up on a person that they know will be coming into our personal spaces. They will probably let us know if we can lower our shoulders a little or if we should remain in the attention stance. They say that children and dogs are the best measuring sticks when it comes to reading the inner beings of people. Children will either gravitate towards a new person and smile or they may cry if they come too close. Dogs will either wag their tails offering a friendly side or bark ferociously to warn the person to stay back. These are telling signs because they know.

So, during these times of greater interaction with others, what vibes are you sending out?  Will a person welcome you with a warm greeting or open arms or will they quietly put their heads down hoping the moment will pass? Will they quickly cross the street when they see you coming towards them? If people ask what type of person you are, will someone volunteer,“Good people?” Or, will they just remain silent and stare out over the horizon as everyone listens to the crickets?

Lynn M.
March 30, 2024

Getting On With It!

Prince Philip, the Duke of Edinburgh, reminded us to “Get on with it.” Sometimes we pause too long while looking back at what was or what almost was. We become like Eudora Welty’s Petrified Man and turn into a pillar of salt like Lot’s wife in the Bible. She could not let go of the past and walk into the beckoning future. She could not get on with it.

When we find ourselves staring at the closed doors, we must wake ourselves and snap out of it. We must take note of our clocks, peer at our watches and look at our calendars and see how much time has actually slipped by us. We must remember the old adage, “Time waits for no man.”

Whether we are lost in grief, reliving precious memories or simply frozen in time, we must stop ourselves from trying to function in the former chapters of our lives. We are no longer living, but wallowing and procrastinating in the sand. Quite like the hypnotist, we must clap our hands together to come out of the deep sleep or trance-like state.

When we are fully awake, we should ask ourselves how many moons have we missed? How many sunsets? How many sunrises have gone by unnoticed while our dark curtains were drawn to hide the light as we drowned in our sorrows?

The sky is always a great determining factor which reminds us that the earth is still spinning on its axis. Nothing has stopped, but us. Once we become fully conscious and our eyes are again open, we absolutely must get up and get moving.  As Les Brown said, “If you can look up, you can get up!”

When we are up and back outside, we may take that early morning jog or walk while the sun peeks over the horizon. We just might be met by a fellow companion traveling alongside us who says, “I’ve been waiting for you. Are you ready to get on with it?”

Lynn M.
March 15, 2024

March 2024

My dear friend, what is March to thee?
Women’s history? Lent? Both key.

Shamrock shuffles and wearing green,
The luck of the draw can be seen.

St. Patty’s Day, dancing galore!
Discards the humdrums as we soar.

Pots of gold, rainbows in the sky,
Warmer temps lifting spirits high!

Lynn M.
March 2, 2024

American Fiction: A Movie Review

Upon a recommendation from my sister, I went to see the movie, American Fiction. It is considered to be a satirical-comedy though it did not always make me laugh. College professor and writer Thelonious Monk (Jeffrey Wright) is given a leave of absence after he offended his students with too many truths about literature. They did not want him to delve that deep as an African American instructor.

So, as life would have it, he leaves his California teaching  position and returns home to Boston. His sister (Tracee Ellis Ross), a doctor, has an unexpected demise and he is forced to deal with his aging mother (Lesslie Uggams) in the throes of Alzhemier’s. His gay brother (Sterling K. Brown), though a plastic surgeon, is not helping with the crisis nor the ensuing costs of their mother’s care. She has become a danger to herself and to those around her and has to be placed into an assisted-living facility.

What will he do? His books are not selling and when he realizes that those in power to publish want him to ghettorize his writings, he is at first appalled. He sees another writer of color (Issa Rae) go all in with her writing as she stoops to their wants. Her books are jumping off the shelf!

So, he decides to go low. He creates the stereotypical characters who are angry, living street life, cursing and extremely violent. The publishers love it! He even pretends to be a fugitive author and he is offered large amounts of money to finish and publish the book. He went on with the charade, hoping that the industry would see it as a joke; however, the somewhat comedic part is that they are all so anxious to read and devour the book.

The movie is based on Percival Everett’s book called Erasure. It is powerful acting and Jeffery Wright is up for several nominations. Though the message is indeed great, reality did set in and he had to choose between his mother’s mounting debts over his personal principles. So, he caves in and sells the manuscript to a movie producer who simply sees it as divine. It explains why we see what we see when black life is portrayed through different forms of media, though it was nothing like the lives that either writer led. Hmmm.

Lynn M.
February 25, 2024